To break free from such a horrible situation involves careful planning and resources and finding some creative ways of hiding money that one can use when forced to escape a potentially dangerous situation involving domestic violence.
The plan in escaping an abusive relationship includes having a safe destination, where obviously, you will not be found and can start a new life, and the resources come down to knowledge, people who can assist you and money to make it all happen.
Chances are, that you can imagine a place where you would rather be and never be found by your abuser. A place where you can find a way to sustain yourself and family economically, without having to worry about domestic violence anymore. Maybe somewhere at the opposite coast, or even another country.
Chances are, there is at least one person that you can trust, who you can count on to help you with your plan -- someone who your abusive spouse will never suspect.
But, to eventually carry out your escape will depend on having enough cash money to carry it out. Relying on your credit cards or your own bank ATM cards will be too risky, as you can easily be traced by the paper trail you would leave. The challenge is to find ways to hide your money, so that there is no trail leading to you, and also hiding it in such a way that your abuser will not find it. The latter is imperative, as your physical safety depends on not arousing suspicion that may put you at risk of even more physical danger.
How to Hide Money
- Find one person you can trust. Once you decide on who you can trust the most to help you, do not tell another soul. This is especially important because of the emotional nature of your situation. People, especially family members may be encouraged to talk to others about your critically important plans, which risk getting back to your abuser. Sometimes another woman who has been abused might be the best to trust in this situation.
- Open a bank account in another person's name. Once you find a trustworthy friend, get them to open a bank account in their name. This is the most important step. You will now have access to the safest hiding place of all for your money. But, do take care not to leave the ATM card or bankbook around your home where it can be found by your abusive husband! Better to find an off-residence hiding place. Your friend can also get a safety deposit box to hide valuables or even more money. Although you're technically not supposed to, these are extenuating circumstances.
- Get your employer to help. If your employer is someone who can be trusted, they can cash some of your checks for you.
- Cash your checks so they are untraceable. If you get paid by check, you can get them cashed at one of those instant check cashing places, usually for a nominal fee around 3% or so. The good thing here is that its untraceable. Then all you have to do is to hide the cash. It might be a good idea to hide some physical paper money as a backup to the main plan of hiding the bulk of it in a friend's bank account.
- Get a passive income going. Find ways to create multiple streams of income, however small they may be. Creating a website about your experiences could be monetized by putting Google ads or something like that. Although the payout is small, every little bit helps. But be careful to do this from your home computer, where he would have access.
- Cover your tracks. Do not talk about your plans from home. I have heard of numerous cases where insanely jealous husbands have tapped their wives phone calls and used keyloggers to record every keystroke on their computers. So, even talking to your friends on some hidden instant messenger account is too risky. Talk to your trusted person face-to-face and in public, say a shopping mall food court. Arrange clandestine meetings with them.
- Learn ways to communicate with people discretely. Learn how to use anonymous mail forwarding services. Use anonymous email services that cannot be traced. Use the public library's computers to email people and work on your websites.
- Plan your escape when you get big money from several income sources at once. For example, at tax time, you might be eligible for a few thousand dollars in tax rebates and also be getting a paycheck. This could be the ideal time to fly the coop!
- Run up some cash advances on your credit cards a few days before your escape. Even something like buying a 100 dollar gift certificate with your credit card, and then buying a dollar item with it and pocketing the cash might help get you some extra bucks.
- Plan carefully! In most cases this escape plan will involve discipline and careful planning on your part. It may be that it could take 6-9 months of saving and socking away money, and to give you the time to plan your destination. The good thing about the Internet is that you can plan to relocate easily and line up temporary accommodation through websites like craigslist. But most of all, rely on yourself - you are all that you have. Trust your instincts and break free; you deserve better!